It's always been you - God is pursuing you in all your relationships

Embrace your destiny and walk in his grace - he is your strength when you are weak, he lifts you up when you can't reach.....

Hello my friends, here I go again, this may be the last blog for a while, as I am headed out for my summer vacation.....and as you know, from last year, I may not always have internet, or not much to say.....

Here is what I learnt the other day: God made it totally clear, that I have to let the love he fills my heart and my very soul with, flow out to those I love - I am not to hold back, even if it's such a legitimate thing as trying to protect myself, which is human nature at it's best, and human nature getting in the way of the true and perfect love, that can be found in Christ alone (Christ in your fellow man - being your lover or your friend)..... as mere humans, we want to protect our hearts from getting hurt, and hold back our love - yet, when we are completely committed to serve God, we cannot and should  not hold back.

These last weeks have been hard, because I did that - protecting myself, holding back my love, thus not being real and true to the love that was flowing through my heart......I lost my Peace and my Joy in the course of protecting myself from getting hurt. This ultimately hurt even more. - Plus, what I was afraid of didn't even happen...

Withholding your love makes you not routed in his love anymore - and the relationship with #theloverofmysoul - aka Jesus Christ, is, what fuels my day, energizes me for the task at hand....because I fell short of understanding his message - that it truly never is about the people in our life, but about his love flowing to them through us or vice versa. I was getting caught up in the drama of life again......but he wants me to look at the bigger picture at all times, that with our human eyes and distorted understanding, we will always fall short of his glory, but if we let Christ in us lead the way, Christ loving us beyond our fear of getting hurt - actually him blessing us beyond measure, if and when we keep loving those around us, the way he wants us to love them, even if we are afraid of getting hurt in the here and now - when we trust him infinitely.

There is a song by #amygrantt called Giggle - and it explains it quite nicely. I know, you are wondering, where I fell short.....well, it's regarding the relationship that I have been having over the last 3 months.....and with my imminent travels to Europe, where I will finally meet him, there were great (old) fears surfacing, that the meeting may not happen, that the chemistry would not be there - even though I highly doubt that, but mostly I feared, that he had lost interest - yet I realized, that it was me reliving some pain of my past, when the man, I thought, God had for  me, never returned for me, and when my ex husband didn't fight for our relationship..... or even when my grandmother died.

All these things I had falsely attributed to them having lost interest, or me not measuring up, me not being valuable enough..... - well, God made it clear, that this was never the case. It was his love reaching out to me through every single man/person I met throughout the years.....and it's his love reaching out to me now - and time will tell, where this relationship will go, but this time I will not quit loving, just because I am afraid I might get hurt. I know, I will be fine, no matter how it turns out.....God is in control and I am trusting him, that he knows what's best for me - I am committed to go all the way this time, and not to withdraw, when things don't go according to my plan, for his plan is bigger - and he will carry me, to where I belong.

Grateful beyond measure, that he has taught me that, and that I can see it now - his thoughts are truly not our thoughts.....that's for sure, yet I don't have to know more than what I need to keep walking by faith and not by sight. God will always love you more than you will ever grasp, and he will bring people into your life, that will love you for him, cause they are willing vessels. That's truly all that counts.

Not sure if I made sense today - I sure hope so......
Be blessed, my dear friends - may God continue to bless you always - 
Amen

Love languages - hmmmm?!?!

Embrace your destiny and walk in his grace - he is your strength when you are weak, he lifts you up when you can't reach.....

Hello my dear friends, in my second last post I said, I was committed to speak to my man in his love language, and I absolutely am - yet I am just realizing, that in order, to learn this love language (and that works for all types of relationships in our lives - children, coworkers, bosses, friends - really anybody we come into contact with on a more regular basis), we have to pay close attention, as to how they speak to us.....most of the times, they reveal their love language to us, through what they give us.....let's say, for someone it's giving gifts - they will give you gifts, others, it's writing you little love notes, that's most likely their love language - again others do things for you..... - when we pay attention to how people treat us, we can learn so much about, how they would like to be treated......

So my commitment goes even deeper - I pledge to learn the love language, that the people closest to me, speak, and I will speak it back to them - and I will always address the queen or the king that resides inside them - for we all desire to be seen, accepted, and appreciated. 

So far I have seen great change in my relationships, when I do that - and most relationships have gained depth in the course of it. Sometimes it also helps, to say, what you'd like to receive.....but I have noticed, that, thanks to God having healed my heart in such a deep way, that my happiness is no longer in relation to others feeding my needs through speaking my love language back to  me - even though I love it, when it's done - and then that relationship is definitely one that means a great deal to me......

I can detect this, by how my heart responds, and often time, when someone hits the right cord, my eyes well up and I shed a tear or two, or even an entire river in mere gratitude...... - you may remember, when I spoke about the special birthday I had this year - well, it was mainly, because the people spoke my love language back to me.

Ultimately it's not so hard, to learn the language of the other person - ask God, to help you to detect which one it is, and then ask him, to help you, to speak it back to the other person - you will see, that eventually things will change, and if not, maybe you have to tell the other person - I know, that we all wish, that the other person would feel or know, how we would like to be treated, but the truth is, that some are being better at reading others, than others, and some people, try very hard, but still have difficulty detecting the right one - talking sure helps. Don't walk away, if the other person doesn't speak to you in your love language......pray about it, ask God for help, in how you should could approach him or her.....and trust, that God will make a way, where there seems to be no way!!!

This whole concept just really sank from head knowledge to heart knowledge a couple of day ago, even though I read the book many years ago - the book is called the '5 Love Languages' by Gary Chapman..... - in case you are interested.

My friends, I gotta go to bed - tonight I had my first harp recital - Geez, was I ever nervous - and i missed a lever change, but people told me, that had I not made this face, that gave it away, that I messed up, nobody would have noticed.....I shall be working on that - next year will be another chance and I will then have 2 years of lessons under my belt - it was great to see and hear students of all different levels of expertise play tonight - it showed me, how I will be doing in a year or even 7 years down the road - I am so committed to this instrument.....I never thought I would be able to say that. I simply love love love the harp.

Be blessed my friends - I love you - praying that you will find out, what love language your partner, child, boss, employee, friend and spouse or significant other speaks, and that you might learn to speak to them in their respective love language......

In the powerful name of Christ I pray

Immensely blessed by 'running' into some people - #alwaysonadivineappointment

Embrace your destiny and walk in his grace - he is your strength when you are weak, he lifts you up when you can't reach.....

Wow, my friends, I thought I'd share this with you - this morning consisted of 'running' into people that were not on my 'go see' list, yet the one's that were did cancel on me - gladly so, cause my schedule is already busy as can be......anyhow, two of the people I ran into had a deep word of God for me......I cannot tell you just yet, what they were, but they hold great promise on many levels - and I receive them both in faith.

I am urging you, follow your impulses, to drive a certain route over another, that you normally take, or if there is a feeling in your heart, to turn right at a traffic light, even though you are on you way somewhere and you need to go straight to get there.....you might miss out on a huge blessing God planned for you to have.

It has happened so many times over the last years, that I am ready to go pretty  much anywhere, when the spirit of God is leading me, as I have been blessed with many many gifts along the way, by simply obeying his call.

It's amazing, and I just get to know him so much better, each time I obey, he trusts me more, each time I obey, he has another gift or revelation for me - I am so often just blown away, at the depth of his love, and the vastness of his wisdom - and how gladly he teaches me, and lets me see his beautiful design of this world.

I am forever grateful for his love and wisdom he conveys to me along the way and how my life has been exponentially changed by my own obedience and his generous spirit - and also even though you might think, by human knowledge and wisdom, you're way off track, when you see the whole picture you might actually be much closer to reaching yet a deeper level of understanding of his truth, than you would give yourself. 

Here I go again: Trust in God with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding, but acknowledge him in all your ways and he will make your path straight - it's been my life line over the last 2 years - and I would for nothing in this world revert to my old way of being, and take back the reins on my life, that I so gladly handed over to him, for what I have today is so much better and I found a peace that truly surpasses all understanding.

May you find that in his loving arms as well - In the powerful name of Christ I pray - 

Amen - be blessed, my friends

Reminiscing...... - committed to learning to speak my man's love language.... - updated!!!

Embrace your destiny and walk in his grace - he is your strength when you are weak, he lifts you up when you can't reach.....

I am going down memory lane today....I don't really know why, but I stumbled across my wedding pictures of almost 12 years ago - the marriage didn't last, which makes me sad......but then again, looking back on all the lessons, that I had the privilege of learning through going through the ups and downs of the last 12 years, I realize that I have come a long way - I would have loved to have my dream of endless/timeless love come true.....and still be happily married - but you can't have everything.......

Through all of it, I learnt to look for the positive in all life's circumstances - I learnt to be grateful for what I have - and taking stock today, I have to say, that I am blessed with two amazing children, who are my pride and joy.....when I look back on all I could learn through the broken marriage, the difficulties along the way, raising my children on my own for the last 4+ years, my son with his issues for so many years - once I started to look my fears straight in the eye, and take ownership and charge of my life, didn't try to blame others anymore, but took them in stride, and embraced them, I learnt to believe, that in all the hardship, God was truly keeping a gift in it for me - all I had to do, was trust him and keep looking for it in every single one of my blessings in disguise. Along the way I found a love so deep and so profound.....one that is nurturing my every need - the eternal love of my eternal bridegroom, #theloverofmysoul, who would never let me go.

Today I know, that I will be able to choose love over ego and selfish needs.....I will not need to be praised by man (a man or mankind), nor will I need another person to complete me - all I need is for the man, that God has for me for life, to accept me completely - as I will completely accept him. 

Before, even though I kind of knew the love language of my ex husband, I couldn't speak to him in his love language - I guess pride and fear were in the way, because he didn't speak to me in mine.....so we didn't fill each others reservoirs of love, out of which we could have passed the love on to each other and to those in our sphere of influence.

Today I am totally committed and willing to learn the love language of my man, as I understand  it as an innate need, that he cannot live without and still be happy - I get that now.....it's just the way that I need it, too - and if I don't get it, my reservoir gets emptied and then we're merely existing - making each other miserable.

Thanks to the enormous love, that Christ (aka the lover of my soul) has for me, I know that I could be happy even if he (my man) didn't speak to me in my love language, because Christ does - and he replenishes my reservoir of love all the time with his tender touch......

It's been a learning curve, but I know, that, should God have another marriage in store for me down the road, I would be successful this time.....it would last for my life time here on earth or beyond, as I have learnt to give all my cares to him, who cares for me..... - and if that coincided, my man having surrendered all of him, to all of Christ, thus being both my man and the lover of my soul, then it's heaven on earth indeed. 

Forever grateful - thank you, my friends, for being such faithful friends - I love you <3

He is always right there with you.....

Embrace your destiny and walk in his grace - he is your strength when you are weak, he lifts you up when you can't reach.....

Hello my friends, some of you know, that I had surgery on my eye just two days ago - I had to remove a lesion on my right eye - it was a basal cell carcinoma......thankfully it's out now - and I wasn't  worried or scared, just a tad apprehensive about the procedure....but once I was in there, all was good. This was the very first time, I was conscious through surgery, mind you, it's only been the 2nd surgery, and the first one was 38 years ago, when I got my appendix out. Honestly I would much rather do it like it was this time again, as when they knock you out, the aftermath is so much worse - this time I could talk with the doctor and I didn't hurt, so all is good.

Actually through the entire procedure, I felt the presence of God there with me....I knew that he was in control and that he was the one holding my hand and that he also made sure, that the surgery went well and that all would be well afterwards. This was the very first time, too, that I completely rested in his care, knowing that nothing could harm me, and that he would make sure that all was going to be fine.

Now I am looking forward to an amazing summer, trusting that again, my sweet daddy in heaven will keep me safe and out of harm's way - when he is on your side, nothing is ever going to throw you off balance again. I shall be praising his name forever - and I know, that the intervention on my eye will again work for the best of me. As a friend of mine put it, I am sure that you will see life even better than before, now - and I believe that, too.....as this tumor has impacted my vision, just by being there, I shall now be seeing clearer and maybe even brighter colours - I will keep you posted.

I believe in all things that happen to you, good or bad, God has a plan or allows it, to further his plan for your life - and everything will bring you closer to your destiny. Please, my friends, never get discouraged, even if a diagnosis is bad and devastating, God can turn this around for your good - whatever the ailment is, he is in control and at the end of the day, when all is said and done, you will come out stronger on the other side. Don't ever believe the snare of the world/the enemy, as God truly is bigger than any of your problems, and in Christ we have victory - A L W A Y S!!!

I am absolutely positive about that, you know, how often in the past I could have given up hope concerning my health - as my childhood was plastered with sick moments, where I at times would even consider it gain, if God just took me home - but he had other plans, and today I am more healthy than ever before - and now this pathological growth has been removed and I am sure, that will have an impact as to how I see the life around me (circumstances, people and all) - stay tuned for the next post.

I love y'all tremendously - praying for you, that you would also consider any challenge in your life a blessing in disguise, a way for God to show you his supremacy and make you see, that he is in control and that he is working for your best yet to come at any given moment.

Hallelujah - #godissooogood :)